Stand, sit, kneel, repeat… It was the part of the mass when we had to stand. This repetition throughout the service drove me crazy. Couldn’t we just stand when we sang, and then sit for the remaining part of the mass? It would be much more enjoyable.
Jesus hung there on the cross. Somber. Bloody. Something just didn’t feel right anymore. This whole Jesus thing seemed to be nothing more a farce. What I once believed, or thought I believed, abandoned me. It didn’t leave me all at once at that moment, but rather a persistent questioning had been slowly chipping away at me for a while. It built up, until on this day while I was staring at Jesus, I no longer believed. I remember making a decision to face the truth – “Jesus was nothing more than a man!”
What occupied me at that moment was something that felt real… a revelation. It hit me so hard, I literally had to maintain my balance.
The only thing we are is energy, and through the natural order of chaos, we came into existence, and when we leave we turn back into energy with no thought or memory. We return to our non-existent state.
At that moment a vision overwhelmed me. The floor dropped out from underneath me revealing a black abyss. I was falling. The feeling was so real and strong I held tightly to the pew in front of me. It was absolute fear, and I wondered how long I was going to feel this way. How could I live with the knowledge that life is pointless because it only leads to death?
The sitting part of the service. Finally! Immediately, I plopped down and started feeling better. I was on stable ground. Within a few minutes a peaceful feeling came over me. I was ok. Everything would be ok. I exhaled long and slow and accepted my fate. When I die it will be final. Nothing more than that. And that was just fine with me – it is what it is. If you can’t change it, embrace it.
That was about 8 years ago, probably 2008. Today, my wife and I are working towards certification as Ministers in the Assemblies of God. Through the grace of God, who led me through a series of moves and events, I came back to know Him in a deep and intimate way.
During this time something took root in me – a mission to prove that God exists without using the Bible. What I found? If you pursue God He will answer you.
He answered me by revealing to me who He is. What I learned has become the bedrock of my faith and I am compelled to share it, especially with people new to the faith, the youth who have been in the faith, and students who attend or are about to attend a secular college.
When anyone seeks God with all their heart, mind, soul and strength, He answers their inquiries and provides a breadcrumb trail to the truth. Revelations, dreams, epiphanies are just a few ways God responds to us when we seek to know Him more.
“Then, after doing all those things, I will pour out my Spirit upon all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your old men will dream dreams, and your young men will see visions. In those days I will pour out my Spirit even on the servants – men and women alike.” — Joel 2:28-29
One of many things God revealed to me is a logic that is the defender of my faith. Whenever I hear satan whispering in my ear, “God doesn’t exist”, or “Do you really believe in this Jesus? Come on, it sounds so stupid! Truthfully, aren’t you embarrassed to believe in this fairytale?”, like a meteor this logic comes out of nowhere and smashes those thoughts into a million pieces.
Not much can stand against this logic, well, at least for me nothing can. It is sound and irrefutable, and very simple. For many people it may be old news, but for me, someone who was coming back to God, this logic is revelation that gives me more of a complete understanding of Him than what I had before. Yes, I have evidence in my everyday living that leads me into a deeper relationship with God, but this logic helped me ramp up to where I am today. It kept me from backsliding, and I believe it can help others from backsliding and moving forward into a deep and tangible relationship with our Creator. It is our goal to become more and more immersed in His Glory.
Over a course of a few years, God revealed to me the understanding I was seeking. It was never one big gushing revelation, (I wish it were), but just bits and pieces. I have been trying to convey it for some time, but organizing the thoughts eluded me. Finally, it is here. a summary of the logic is something like this:
Something has always existed because something living must give life to life. This somethingness contains all that is necessary to create life, and contains much more than what we will discover in this world. It is infinite in size, time, concepts, and matter and cannot be quantified. It has no starting point, so it never began, and yet it will it ever end. It exists because something must exist, and it will always exist. It is self-sufficient, self-existent, and the single origin and source of life. This somethingness is the infinite, who is God.
Only a living being can give birth to life. The alternative to that logic is spontaneous generation, which is an obsolete theory. Summarized, spontaneous generation suggested that an organism can be created spontaneously without a creator. In 1859, Louis Pasteur disproved this theory, and the science community supports his findings. In fact, it is taught to our children in school. “Taught to our children.” That statement sums up how obvious it should be not to place our faith in some debunked and misguided theory. Yet so many “intelligent” adults do this, including professors. Isn’t that an oxymoron?
It is pretty obvious this theory can be crossed off the list of possibilities of how life began. This leaves us with only one option, something existed to give life to this universe, and any other universe.
There is a single origin for life, for this world or any other world we are not privy to, which is one infinite entity that contains everything necessary for creating life and sustaining it. This entity would not only be infinite in space and time, but also in matter and concepts. Life is not just light and particles; it is also algorithms, concepts, philosophies, emotions, color, voids… (If you can think it, it’s in there!) All these things, everything, already exist in some form within the infinite.
If there is one thing that does not exist within the infinite, then the source of life wouldn’t be infinite. There would be two sources of life, one with everything but that one missing element, and the other source with the one element. If there are two sources, then what made the decision of which life source contains what elements? Regardless of how we challenge this logic, the bottom line is, there is ultimately one source of life, regardless of how it is organized, from which all things derive.
The single origin of life is self-sufficient, requiring nothing to exist. Just as there is no starting point to time, there is no starting point for the single source of life. It merely exists, and always has. As well, it will never end. It just is.
God said to Moses, “I AM WHO I AM”; and He said, “Thus you should say to the sons of Israel, ‘I AM has sent me to you.’” — Exodus 3:14
There are many translations of the original Hebrew letters for Exodus 3:14, but the essential meaning succinctly conveys the same message, “I exist because I do.”
In a time when Pharaohs were gods, and people worshiped Baal, the Jews capture the essence of God in such an abstract concept that I cannot help but wonder, why their God was so different? Why didn’t they grab a piece of wood and carve out some idol? That is what everyone else did. What set them apart in their understanding of God? While most people relied on themselves to formulate a god, the Jews had a God that revealed Himself to them.
Make no mistake, “God” is not some universal name that can be applied to any theology. “God” explicitly refers to the God of Israel. There are many theologies that claim to have an understanding of God, with very convincing evidence. However, unless these theologies reveal their god to be the God of Israel, then their doctrine is incomplete.
Only God exists. As the single origin of life, God contains all things necessary for life. Whatever we have is given to us by God. Our hair, our eyes, our thoughts and character have always existed, and were given to us by Him. He is infinite in resources, and all things, including life as we know it, exist within Him, not outside of Him. Nothing exists outside of God because He is all that exists, and therefore, He encompasses all things.
There are many more Bible verses that describe God as infinite, omnipresent, omnificent, omnipotent, everlasting, unending, self-sufficient… that I could include. But, this is a posting, and a long one at that. It includes the baseline for a logic that for me is irrefutable. It is the defender of my faith. Having only come to the Lord in my twenties and for very selfish reasons, and having an on-again-off-again relationship with Him, this understanding, which is Biblically sound, has been my saving grace from backsliding into off-again.
It is my hope and prayer that this posting has given you the solid footing you need to move forward in your relationship with the Father.
P.S.: Given this logic, a more accurate title for “Newton’s Law of Physics” is “God’s Law of Physics as Revealed to Sir Isaac Newton”. And, yes, even evolution, the concept of it, whether it is right or wrong, could only come from God, since He is the source of all things.
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