One of the gifts a castrating single Christian egalitarian wants for the holidays …is a potential partner. Like many of my single Christian friends I have been lovingly (and not so lovingly) interrogated about my continued singleness. However, until recently I believed securing a partner was a fringe benefit; something that miraculously comes to you while you are “seeking first the kingdom/ “kin-dom” of God.” But then I had a moment of insight and thought, “what could be a better example of the kingdom/ “kin-dom” of God than a loving life- long partnership premised on and sustained by the love of Christ?”
I have listened to several suggestions, some more memorable than others, as to how to achieve my goal. There are those who have advocate Internet dating. Apart from my pride that tells me that I really don’t have a problem attracting men, my only real problem with Internet-dating is human nature. The average human is self-interested and as a result is prone to “airbrushing,” which is greatly facilitated by Internet. The potential suitor can be anything he or she believes you want until he or she achieves the desired end. Another more novel approach is that of a “mail-order mate’ but unfortunately for me these services are more suited to males seeking “traditional women” from developing countries.
I must confess that I like traditional things. I love my grandmother’s sweet potato pudding with the creamy custard on top. I prefer when my pudding is made from fresh ( not canned or frozen) coconut milk. In the old days the coconut milk was obtained by hand grating the coconut, but as soon my grandmother bought a blender she no longer grated the coconut by hand. She did not believe that scraped fingers made the pudding more delicious. In essence I believe my grandmother was teaching us that tradition is great as long as it does no harm.
Second only to low self-esteem, a traditional view of male-female relationship is one of the main features of relationships characterized by domestic violence, so like my grandmother I don’t grater things by hand that are safer to blend.
So we have come to my real problem. I am an unrepentant castrating single Christian egalitarian. I know I am treading on dangerous waters when I mention castration, but my form of Christianity renders it necessary. It is the kind of Christianity in which the possession of a phallus whether organically grown, bought or made is not the criterion for leadership; Christianity that views the Bible as divinely inspired yet gravely affected by human limitations as exemplified in instances such as Pauline theology. In Pauline theology women are commanded to be both silent in church as well as cover their heads when prophesying— mildly contradictory. Another example is that of Bible translators who in Romans 16 changed the name of Paul’s relative Junia (female), who is described as a prominent apostle, to Junias (male). Mine is the kind of Christianity that confesses that “ as many of you as were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is no longer Jew or Greek, there is no longer slave or free, there is no longer male or female; for all of you are one in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3).” No, we are not all the same. We are still beautifully diverse but our worth, our purpose, our possibility are determined by Christ who loves all of us and not our genitalia.
So I know I have been more naughty than nice this year (most years) but since I am asking a God of grace and not a Santa of merit I will keep hope alive. A merry everything to you and yours.
Renegade












